Lessons from 100 Days of “No””
“Rejection Proof” is an encouraging narrative by Jia Jiang that plunges into the experience of how the inventor who faced disapproval bravely had a turnover in his life and mind. Jiang breaks barriers in the book by writing about his mysterious process of facing his greatest problem, i.e., self-restriction. He had undertaken a “100 Days to Rejection” challenge to overcome the phobia of people turning him down stemming from the ingrained fear of failure.
At the onset, Jiang opens up about his personal and career difficulties. He was unhappy at work and at home despite being successful and starting a family. He was wanting to be an entrepreneur and tried many other ventures; everything else failed. He would often miss good opportunities out of fear of rejection or the cynicism of being incapable, a defensive fatalism captured and refactored here. This inner contradiction was his source of motivation to deal with his fear of rejection in a direct way.
Even though Jiang was often asking for crazy ideas in the places he visited, his experiment of “100 Days of Rejection” actually boiled down to the expectation that he would be told “no” (and then some). To his surprise, some of the requests were accepted. Nevertheless, when they weren’t, the responses were often much less sour than he had forecasted. He was shy at first, but quitting the script exposed him to the possibility that people would not be rude. He turned down invitations to hang out with various people and dates. He attributed it to the fact that his blissful state and fear release at the time. Moreover, through the numerous rejections, his confiding in people became stronger too.
Throughout his journey, Jiang learned several important lessons:
- Rejection Is Not Personal: He discovered that the majority of the rejections are about the situation or the request and not about the person. This knowledge helped him to denounce the outcome personally and instead went to the situations with a positive attitude. He also found that rejection is the opportunity to learn about yourself and that curiosity is a better approach than fear.
- Ask boldly, receive unexpectedly: He discovered that if you ask for what may seem impossible, you might be surprised to get a positive outcome instead of the expected negative consequences. At the same time, if the manner of your request is confident and polite, most people will be willing to fulfill it.
- Growth Comes from Discomfort: Through intentionally stepping out of his comfort zone and exposing himself to uncomfortable situations, Jiang became more resilient, and at the same time, consequently, he gained the readiness to persevere and to be creative.
- Empathy and Connection Matter: His experiment showed him that rejection can be brought down by how the request is made. Treating people with respect and understanding whether they are down or not can build phenomenal bonds where there were none.
Jiang’s experiment awoke to the fact that rejection, which he had been regarding as a derogatory matter, became a strong one with which he felt fit to chase his own business objectives. The written story gives more confidence to the readers that they should take failure as a pushing step that could turn to your success, as well as rejection as an avenue for growth rather than a source of sorrow.
In the end, Rejection Proof is more than a book that gives a helping hand to those who are scared of something—it is a guide that teaches the reader how to eliminate the obstacles in personal development and the career through rejection and come out of the process a better version of themselves.
Watch Jia Jiang’s TED Talk for more insights into his journey.
